EpicParent.tv – Honest • On the Edge • Creative Parenting

So today is a big day for Sprad!  It was 40 years ago today that I invaded the world!  Yep, that’s right…today I turn the BIG 40.  If you have any advice for me on how to approach my 40’s please leave a comment and equip me with any wisdom you might have…

So get ready…here are 40 parenting tips I have learned over my 40 years of life…

1.  Take lots of pictures

2.  Leave notes in your kids lunches

3.  ALWAYS ASK FORGIVENESS

4.  Let your kids fail

5.  Laugh

6.  Stop aggravating your kids!  Still trying to learn this one

7.  Dad’s date your daughters or someone else will

8.  Don’t sweat the bad grades so much

9.  Don’t play favorites, spread your time out equally

10.  Show your kids Jesus, nothing else really matters

11.  Find your kids mentors

12.  Read to them at night

13.  Pray over your kids most nights

14.  Don’t make your kids walk on egg shells

15.  Use your inside voice, no need to scream

16.  If your divorced, JUST GET ALONG

17.  Go to your kids’ games, it means more than you think

18.  ALWAYS ASK FORGIVENESS

19.  Hug your kids everyday

20.  Say “I LOVE YOU” a bunch

21.  Make their favorite snack just because

22.  Ask them “how can I pray for you”

23.  Let them choose the TV station & radio station

24.  When they deserve punishment simply hug them…give irrational grace

25.  Let them jump bed to bed in the hotel

26.  Encourage them to slide down the stairs on a sled

27.  Let them eat on the couch

28.  Get up and dance with them at the wedding reception

29.  Do a Chinese fire drill with your kids…my wife did this last week

30.  Take the toilet papering

31.  Let them skip school

32.  Give them $100 and let them spend it without parameters

33.  Let your controlling kids choose every meal and activity for the day

34.  DID SAY ASK FORGIVENESS J

35.  Sit down and play legos with them…without watching the clock

36.  Give them your cell phone for the entire day

37.  Let them sit in your lap and drive

38.  Encourage them to build a fort in the living room and sleep in it with them

39.  Let them sleep on the trampoline

40.  Deposit Jesus in their heart every single day

Do you have any parenting tips you would like to add?

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My kids are constantly looking for something to do or looking for dad to be the Team Sprad Recreation Director.

• “Dad, will you take me fishing”

• “Dad, let’s go rock climbing”

• “Dad, can we go out to eat”

• “Dad, lets go snowboarding”

• “Dad, can we go to Six Flags”

• “Dad, let’s go get ice cream”

• “Dad, let’s ride dirt bikes”

• “Dad, can we watch a movie on Netflix or Redbox”

• “Dad, can we go to the pool”

I am learning that I have taught my kids that life should always be about  rollercoasters, last second shots, big air, quadruple brownie hot fudge sundays with extra cherries and the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow.

The reality of life is that much of it is mundane, routine and even kind of boring.  I am working to reverse this curse by boring my kids.  Here is a few things I am trying to reverse the curse of high expectations in my kids…

• Eat at home more often
• Play more board games and legos
• Turn off the tv and spend time together doing nothing (wow…novel idea)
• Playing catch in the front yard
• Family bike ride around the neighborhood
• Spend a Fam Night at home
• Have a “stay-cation”, take a week off and hang around the house
• Create space for “creativity”…have your kids invent a product, business, write a book or____________________(fill in the blank)
• Spend time in God’s Word (give them stuff to read each night before they go to bed)
• Give them the family video cam, video editing software and let them create
• Re-arrange their room they way they want to

In my role as dad I have taught my kids that every moment in life should be chalked full of dirtbikes, going, fishing, cheer, staying busy, eating out, playing sports, skating, rock climbing, movies, swimming, hiking and biking just to name a few.

However, i am realizing that our role as parents is to train our kids that life is not always “a box of chocolates” or one big fun “roller coaster ride”.  I believe that when we intentionally bore our kids, creativity, innovation and entrepreneurship will thrive!

What is 1 thing that you need to STOP doing & START doing to teach your kids contentedness in life?

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Team Sprad was visiting family in Louisiana one summer and we were traveling on the Lake Pontchartrain Causeway, which is the second longest causeway over water measuring almost 24 miles.  As we merged onto the bridge, Cole informed us with a scream from the back that he had to go to the bathroom and he had to go NOW!!

I did what any loving, caring and nurturing Father would do.  I ignored him, acted like I didn’t hear him and prayed it would just go away.

Cole continued to complain and groan for the next 20 plus miles.

Why couldn’t he just…

• Focus on isolating his urethra muscles like most 4  year old’s would do
• Stand and cross his legs
• Allow his lower abdomen to tilt slightly relieving pressure
• Avoid thinking of waterfalls
• Avoid thoughts of letting pee out (think happy thoughts)

Cole finally lost it and screamed from the top of his lungs…

“Dad, will you pull this damn van over!!!”

and he used it in context!

What!!?!

What did he just say!!?!

He was 4!!?!

Where had he heard that before!!?!

I honestly don’t know where Cole picked this up, it’s not typical Team Sprad language, but he picked it up somewhere!

Parents, let this be a reminder that your kids are always watching, listening, observing, paying attention and copying all that you do.

Stop.

Take an inventory.

What are you currently watching, saying and doing that you need to stop today?

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I found myself in an interesting conversation this week with some friends about kids and chores.  I am truly blown away at how many parents expect very little from their kids when it comes to help around the house!  Come on, this is basic parenting stuff!  All kiddos should either be paying rent or doing work around the house.  I am kidding about the rent, but I believe with all my heart that kids of all ages should be helping around the house.

My smoking hot wife (i hope she is reading this)  is in nursing school so I am responsible for all the Mr. Mom & Mr. Dad stuff!  (SIDENOTE…Mom’s I had no idea what you really do!)  With Jodie in school every member of Team Sprad HAS to help out or the Sprad Family Ship would sink.

So I thought I would give you a glimpse into what all of our responsibilities are…

SPRAD (that’s me)

• Garage
• Laundry  (Jodie helps when she is available)
• Master bedroom & bath
• Kitchen
• Cooking  (not so good at this, we eat out way too much)
• Homework

COLETRAIN (12 years)

• Trains room & bathroom
• Living room & vacuuming
• Playroom
• Snowblowing & shoveling
• Mowing & weedeater
• MAKES HIS OWN LUNCH
• Puts away his laundry  (except when I find it under his bed)

KYLIEFAITH  (11 years)

• Kylie’s room & bathroom
• Playroom
• Kitchen with dad
• Office & loft
• Helps dad fold clothes
• MAKES HER OWN LUNCH
• Puts away her laundry
• Pulls weeds in the summer
• Helps shovel snow

TIFTON JACKHAMMER  (9 years)

• Tifton’s room & bathroom
• Playroom
• Loads and unloads the dishwasher
• Guest bathroom
• Shovels snow
• Pulls weeds in the summer
• Picks up dog poo
• MAKES HIS OWN LUNCH
• Puts away his laundry

My kids don’t get an allowance for this, it is just expected because they are a member of Team Sprad!

DO YOUR KIDS HAVE CHORES?  IF SO, WHAT?

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Team Sprad listened to an audio book on a recent trip called Heaven Is For Real.  This is a story that has hit the New York Times Best Seller List and is about a young boy that emerges from life – saving surgery with remarkable stories of his visit to heaven.  Team Sprad was inspired, challenged, broken, laughed and cried!  It is a must read or listen for all families devo time!

Heaven Is For Real is the true story of the four-year old son of a small town Nebraska pastor who during emergency surgery slips from consciousness and enters heaven. He survives and begins talking about being able to look down and see the doctor operating and his dad praying in the waiting room. The family didn’t know what to believe but soon the evidence was clear.

Colton said he met his miscarried sister, whom no one had told him about, and his great grandfather who died 30 years before Colton was born, then shared impossible-to-know details about each. He describes the horse that only Jesus could ride, about how “reaaally big” God and his chair are, and how the Holy Spirit “shoots down power” from heaven to help us.

Told by the father, but often in Colton’s own words, the disarmingly simple message is heaven is a real place, Jesus really loves children, and be ready, there is a coming last battle.

You can find Heaven Is For Real HERE.

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Inspiration for this post came from Artie Davis, you can see the post HERE!

I have a million things I would like to change, implement or stop when it comes to my parenting…

• consistent devotionals
• pay more attention to homework
• spend more one on one time
• strategic reading plan for my kiddos
• tuck them in and pray every night

I know there are superparents out there and you can flat get it all done!  You can run the kids around, do laundry, coach football, clean the house, double check homework and find time to play on Facebook.

But as for me, Mr. Chris Spradlin, I CAN’T get it all done, so I started to ask the question…

WHAT’S MY 1 THING?

What do my kids need from me more than anything else?

The answer for Team Sprad was…Jesus.  Not in a weirdo Christian, your bad if you don’t say Jesus, TV evangelist  kind of a way.  But right now, the season Team Sprad is in, my kids need me to teach them more about Jesus.  That’s my 1 thing.   So we have changed our schedule, said no to some stuff so that we can spend more time talking about Jesus.

What do your kids desperately need from you more than anything else?

WHAT’S YOUR 1 THING?

Change your schedule, say not to some stuff so that you can spend more time talking about your 1 thing!  (and it doesn’t have to be Jesus )

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My friend, Caroline Moon, has a blog and she recently wrote an article that jacked me up!  She shared that she only had 160 months left with her son before he heads out to college.

So I pulled out the calculator and realized that Jodie and I have…

• 78 months left with Cole
• 90 months left with Kylie
• 108 months left with Tifton

Time is short and I was reminded of the following…

• The house doesn’t have to be clean
• Parents must start the spiritual formation process in my kids (no more excuses, start devo time w/ your fam)
• Take the fly fishing “tie flying” class with Cole
• I need to go on the next field trip, NO EXCUSES!
• Workaholics invest in everyone, but their kids get the scraps
• I must teach my kids to be Kingdom minded

How many months do you have left with your kiddos & what do you need to teach them?