- Give Your Kids Permission To Be Brutally Honest: Ask your kids if they think you are a workaholic. sit there, shut your mouth and listen, really listen to their heart.
- Ask Forgiveness: I’m sorry doesn’t work! Get eye to eye, heart to heart and ask them to forgive you. Not a general I forgive you but a very specific, line item by line item.
- Ask Them To Pray For You: Right then, ask your kids to place their hand on you and pray that God would give you the power and his strength to change. (bring your kids into the process)
- Ask For Your Kid’s Help: Tell your kiddos that you are going to fail. Give them permission to lovingly and respectfully point out when you fall off the “family man bandwagon”.
- Talk To The Boss: This can be the most difficult part of the process. Sit down with your boss, share your heart and ask him/her to help you spend more time with your family. I have walked through this process personally…more to come this week on “how to” do this.
- Re-arrange Your Calendar: If you are married, give your wife access to your calendar. Allow her to schedule school lunches, field trips and recitals for you. If you are a single parent (I SALUTE YOU) ask a friend to hold you accountable for intentionally scheduling “kid/fam” time.
- Cell Free Zone: I have mentioned this before, but you should give your kids permission to declare a “Cell Free Zone”…maybe once or twice a week? During this time you can’t talk, text, email, glance or even have the phone on you. (you CAN do this, just make sure you have someone at work appointed to take important calls during this time)
- Computer Free Zone: Create some boundaries around taking the computer to bed with you! It seriously can mess up your sex life!
- Get Professional Help: EpicParent.tv has strategic partnerships and networks with professional counselors across the world. If you truly struggle with being addicted to work, get professional help. Please email me and I can connect you with a qualified professional counselor.
- Take This Job & Shove It: So this is a little extreme, I just love the country song. Seriously, after walking through the previous 9 steps and you’re getting no results, you might consider a career change. Please be sure to be prayerful, seek counsel and be confident God is leading you this way. A career change can be tough in any season of life, especially one where the economy is weak.
What Have I Left Out? Please Add To The Convo By Commenting
Great tips! I am a recovering work-a-holic! I was the worst kind. A mom that believed I could do it all and really worked hard to be SuperWoman/Mom. My life caught up to me with a string of health problems which ultimately led me to quitting my job. I became a stay at home mom for 15 months until I changed career paths and went into teaching. Now I have the same schedule as my kids and husband who is also a teacher/coach and my workload is so much lighter. Just got to spend the 5 day weekend with the family. Now just work 3 more weeks and off for 2 more weeks! It really is nice!
All great advice, Sprad. I especially love the “Permission to be brutally honest” note. Kids too often feel like it’s not safe to say what they really think. I know that’s the case at my house, and I’m trying harder to not be defensive with my kids.
Thanks for hitting home!
Genuinely definitely very good website article which has got me considering. I never looked at this from your point of view.
So refreshing to see these valuable tips. I struggle with being a workaholic. Have really re-evaluated my life lately & with God’s leading have made some changes, less work, more time for family. I grew up in a family with a workaholic father, whom I barely knew, and he in return did not know me. Still 41 years later I am struggling with this. God is bringing me healing as I offer forgiveness. It is so important that we let our children know how amazingly important they are! Love reading your posts!
My children tell me when I am working too hard. I am not so much a workaholic but I nejoy my work and work outside their time. It is hard when you feel passionately about something and are happy to work long hours but making sure you have the energy and temperament when you are with them is very important.