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I wish I could say that I gave this speech 6 years ago, yeah…not so much.
My stupidest parenting speech was last week and it went a lil something like this…
TRAIN (my 14 year old son): “Dad, I think I want to go to the football game tonight.”
STUPID ME (41 year old mature EpicParent): “Awesome, I’ve been wanting to catch a game as well…what time do you want to leave?”
AWKWARD SILENCE #1
TRAIN: “Well dad, I was thinking I would go by myself…I’m just wanting to hang with some of my new friends from school.”
AWKWARD SILENCE #2
STUPID ME: “Are you embarased of your dad?”
TRAIN: “No, I just want to hang out with my new friends by myself.”
STUPID ME: “I will NOT have kids that are embarassed of their dad. I did not raise you that way. I didn’t raise you to be super cool kid. I didn’t raise you to be one of those kids that are too cool for dad!!!!!!!! and a few more exclamation points !!!!!!!!!!”
So…
After I made him feel guilty through my monster manipulation and guilt, I had to wrap around with him and ask for his forgiveness.
Why am I such a stupid parent sometimes??
Don’t leave me hangin! I would love to hear about one of your finest “stupid” parenting moments?
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Call me next time…I’ll go to the game with you!
you got it!!
My boys were 3 and 6 at the time I really shined as a parent. I put them in the bath, then ran out to get the laundry. Upon returning from the garage, I entered the hallway, outside the bathroom door and slipped on the newly formed River Winchester. I entered the bathroom and stepped onto the bathmat that was squishy with water (I HATE soaking bathmats). The floor was a huge puddle and the boys were laughing and splashing as though they were in a pool on a hot summer day. I was so, so angry. What followed sounded something like this, “I can’t leave you boys for 30 seconds without you destroying the house! Get out of the bathtub, NOW! You can clean this up! Clean it up, NOW! You know what? You are both grounded. You can not take a bath for a week! Do you understand?” Picture this, if you will. Two naked little boys on their hands and knees, pushing dripping towels around the floor in a feeble attempt to clean up their watery mess. Standing over them, in soaking house shoes, is their yelling momma who just grounded them from personal hygiene. My six year old began crying and said, “So we’ll just have to be stinky and dirty?” My response was, “You should have thought of that before you made this mess.” I walked out of the room to cool off and replayed what I had said to myself. What the heck? I just grounded them from bathing? Seriously? How am I going to enforce this one? Idiot.
great story Lora! You should be a writer…you got a nack for telling a story.
My now 26 year old daughter was 5. We were camping in the Ozarks. We were sitting around our little table eating my delicious meal I slaved over in the hot sun. She had eaten most of her food, but had not touched her green beans. She announced to all she was finished eating. I announced to all she was going to clean her plate. She told me she wasn’t feeling well (all of the sudden). I was going to win this battle and I insisted she eat her beans. She pushed back talking about not being hungry anymore for green beans. The beans were good and I insisted she eat them. She finally took a bite, I smiled and said, “See, they’re good!” As she knodded her head ‘yes’, She threw up all over her paper plate and the camping table. My wife Sherri still laughs about this great parenting event!
that is awesome Randy! I’ve been down that “you will eat all your veggies” route as well…usually doesn’t turn out so well. As you know.
Chris,
I’ve had an almost identical conversation with my now 15 yr old son, Kade! Except I took it even further and said, “Don’t you know I’m a youth minister and kids your age actually WANT to hang out with me!?!? I’m COOL!!!” Yeah that was STUPID ME!
By the way, there was no awkward silence after the “I’m cool” comment. Just laughter!
That’s awesome Billy! I think you’re cool!
No single incidents here………..I could write a book with the stupid things I have done/said to my children. I sure hope they can afford a good psychiatrist when they are older to help fix all of the things I have caused. Wish I could say I have it all together now………but I’m pretty sure I haven’t run out of “stupid” yet.
hate to say it Shawn…but I don’t think I am done w/ the stupid either!!
I think putting my child to bed when they were not tired hence them getting up several times and when they were having a sleepover I did not let them stay up late instead of letting them stay up later to have more fun – they did not like that!
I appreciate your honesty! Hope you all are well!
Trying to keep it real Daniel!!