This week, my youngest son, Tifton Jack (AKA…Jackhammer) spent some time with some friends and he was disgusted how one sibling was treating the other. Tifton is introverted and a man of few words, but when he does speak up, you better listen! On the way home from Tifton’s friends, our conversation went something like this…
JHAMMER: “Dad, it made me sick to my stomach today, to see how “Steve” treated “Jayne”. (names have been altered to conceal the victims true identities J)
SPRAD: “Did you say something to them? Did you ask Steve to stop treating his sister that way”?
JHAMMER: “Yeah”
SPRAD: “What did he say”
JHAMMER: “Nothing”
Did I mention, he is a man of few words?
JHAMMER: “So I went and told their parents how bad Steve was”.
JHAMMER: “Dad, did you know that there is a difference between ‘tattling’ and ‘telling’”?
JHAMMER: “And sometimes you just need to tell“.
I love it!
Parents!! Sometimes your kids just need to “tell”?
- Teach your kids to TELL on bullies.
- Teach your kids to TELL when strangers talk to them or take pictures of them. (this happened to my daughter, you can read the post HERE)
- Teach your kids to TELL when their friends are taking drugs or drinking. (it might save a life)
- Teach your kids to TELL on themselves when they do something wrong (teach them the new win is honesty, honesty over comfort)
- Teach your kids to TELL when a pastor, teacher or someone of influence asks them to behave inappropriately.
- Teach your kids to TELL if a boy treats them harshly or violently. (Teach this now)
- Teach your kids to TELL if a friend of the opposite sex abuses them.
When do you think it is appropriate for your kids to “TELL”
Would you like to receive EpicParent’s newest posts by email? If so, click HERE or to add it to your reader click HERE.
Sprad great post again.
We teach our kids the difference between telling and tattling is what they do. They are welcome to tell us anything but they have to speak up first. For example if there brother touch their stuff they have to first ask them to stop if he continues to touch everything they are then free to tell and it is no longer tattling.
Does that makes sense?
absolutely! great point. stoked you are having these types of conversations w/ your kiddos!!
This is great. As I was reading it I was thinking “So my husband and I are great at encouraging our children to TELL at the necessary times, but tattling is an issue with our 6 year old, so how do you encourage TELL and discourage TATTLE?”. Then I read Sam’s reply and received a little bit of an answer. Thanks to both of you!
Sam is the man Leena. Great father & very wise. You should check out his blog at http://www.samluce.com.
Yes let them tell but make sure you listen!
Absolutely!! loved your post today!
OK, so first, I have to say, I saw you walking out of SPE the other day and briefly “why do I know him” then realized, “oh yeah, that’s Sprad! I read his blogs!”
Second, I saved this blog, and in the car today, I initiated a conversation with my 6 year old, talking about this interesting email I got, and asked “do you know there’s a difference between tattling and telling?” Blew my mind when she said “Yes” and proceeded to explain the difference as best as she could (which was awesome), and gave me examples. I asked her “did you learn this from Mrs. Hobson?” She said yes. I said “always listen to Mrs. Hobson, she teaches you some of the most important stuff at school.” I then pulled up your email and went through your points like a checklist and we sat outside Staples, talking about them, asking and answering questions, before we finally went inside. THANKS!